Clarifying Misconceptions

A couple of days ago, Danni Lemon posted a message on the UWC listserves. The message was about conversation that she had with Stuart and Barb. She shared what Stuart and Barb think about the governance debate and a lot of their thoughts had to do with me and Juliet Guichon. The message was illuminating because it revealed that the College (i.e. people like Stuart and Barb and probably Diana and other Board members) has some serious misconceptions about me.

I’ve thought about Danni’s message for two days now and think I can understand how Stuart and Barb arrived at their misconceptions. First and foremost, I’m an outspoken person who is not timid about speaking out publicly. Credit Pearson College Village Meetings for developing that tendency in me! When one person speaks out and speaks out often, it’s easy to get the impression that nobody else cares about the issue or the person is a spokesperson for a group.

The debate on governance has also raged on for about three years now. My own thoughts have evolved over that time and I’m sure the College’s thoughts on the topic have evolved as well. My original focus was on graduates, but as you will see from subsequent postings, I now have a wider concern. There’s nothing like a conflict to force you to really think through what’s important to you, why you believe what you do and do what you do. From that perspective, conflict is not inherently bad; indeed, it can be a creative growing process. I know I’ve learnt a lot in the last 4 years!

Conflict also has to be managed to be effective as a change process. On reflection, I’ve reached the conclusion that there are things that I could have done differently and I think there are things that the College could have done differently. Mistakes have been made by both sides. But it’s never too late change, especially not when there is a will among all parties.

It’s important to me to clear up the misconceptions. I’d rather people hear directly from me what I believe than hear it through a third party. And I’ll be honest: my thoughts and beliefs have changed over three years as I have come to understand and know more. My ideas are probably still “radical” from the College's perspective but I think they are more nuanced and balanced. And I don't think my ideas are unreasonable.

Another reason to clear up misconceptions is that I can’t rule out the possibility that my communication style may sometimes cast impressions other than those I seek to make. I work very hard to be careful with my language, both to convey my ideas effectively and to avoid being offensive. However, “you can’t please all of the people all of the time” and I know there have been times when what I have said has offended people because people have told me that I’ve offended them. In all likelihood there are others who have not told me that I’ve offended them. I know I’ve done that in relationships from time to time. And of course, if you don’t talk about being hurt and offended, then the feelings fester, resentments build and the atmosphere becomes hostile. This can be particularly difficult for the offending party who may be genuinely blind to what they have done that caused offense.

And that leads to my final reason for wanting to clear up misconceptions: because I think the misconceptions get in the way of community harmony. Conflicts often arise from misunderstandings about what has been said, about what has not been said and about alleged motives of all parties concerned. The result is community disharmony, which is not a pleasant state.

I’ve spent the last two days identifying the misconceptions and clarifying in my own mind exactly what I would like to see from the College, but just on the issues of membership in the corporation and proxy voting. (I have thoughts on other issues, but I want to limit myself to what’s really important.)

Let me stress: the ideas are mine and mine alone. If you agree with my ideas, wonderful. If you don’t agree, that’s equally wonderful. If you have different ideas, that’s also wonderful. Are my ideas perfect? I doubt it. Should they all be implemented? Of course! But I’m a realist: ideas are negotiable.

What follows is divided into four sections: Misconceptions, Values, Ideas, Rationale.

The misconceptions section identifies and clarifies the misconceptions about me.

The values section is about what values underpin my ideas. My hope is that even if we disagree about ideas, we might agree about values and if we agree on values, I believe that disagreements about ideas can be resolved. Of course, that resolution still requires the cooperation of all parties, including a willingess to give a little. I truly hope that willingness exists. For the sake of the College. There are people who are so alienated that they refuse to give money to the College anymore. Others (including myself) talk about not attending College reunions. And I know people who throw away mail from the College as soon as it drops into their mailbox and without even opening it. None of that is good for the College.

My ideas are in the third section. I’ve listed the ideas in short sentence format with no explanation of any rationale behind the idea. I opted to use that approach to avoid what my legal writing professor calls “lasagna in a blender”. Lasagna is supposed to be in nice layers, but if you put it in the blender, everything gets mixed up and it’s no longer appetizing. Similarly, I concluded that if I put the ideas and the rationale together, it might make my document less appetizing and more difficult to follow. Of course, I could be completely mistaken about this…

Warning: if you find yourself getting hot under the collar over any of my ideas, please be sure to read the fourth section before drawing your final conclusion. If you read the fouth section carefully, you will understand what my thought processes are and hopefully an idea that initially seemed outrageous will make more sense.

The rationale for my ideas is in the fourth section.

I hope that there might be some debate, but even if there is no debate, at least you know where I stand on issues. I am also sending the document to Diana Maughan. Who knows what might happen.

Peace be with each and every one of you.